get back to where..

It's so unlike me to say this but sometimes, I do enjoy the quietness. The feeling of having no one around you, being all alone - it's so serene. It's like, after hating something for so long, as my case goes, after being alone most of the time, I begin to see the beauty of it. I just feel like getting away from everything. Family, friends, personal interest - everything. Sitting all alone in my room, pondering all possibilities of the what if this or what if that. Let the world be another memory as I drift further and further away from it.

im not real, not permanent..

The more I sit alone, the more I feel separated from this damn world that’s so full of unnecessary hurt and unwanted pain. Not being bothered by that worrying handphone that bring more hurt than joy. Not being bothered by the call of my parents asking me to go dinner. Not being bothered by the random and rare hi and byes from my brother. Not being bothered by the calls from great friends that offer a many great fun. I just don’t care. Or more precisely, I don’t want to care.

..like the moon on a lake..

I’m tired of hurting and being hurt. I’m tired of loving and not loved. I’m tired of faking a smile and receiving one. I’m tired of the pain in my body. I’m tired of seeing other people’s pain and not able to do a thing about it. I’m tired of looking for joy. I’m tired of seeing other people’s joy and envying it. I’m as tired as my father. Holding on to feel the same. Holding on..

..the sun hides itself

Taking my bike out and riding it to nowhere. Going as far as I can without any direction, without purpose. Hoping for something different to happen along the way. Hoping..

sugarcult
memory

This may never start
We could fall apart
And I'd be your memory
Lost your sense of fear
Feelings insincere
Can I be your memory

So get back, back, back to where we lasted
Just like I imagine
I could never feel this way
So get back, back, back to the disaster
My heart's beating faster
Holding on to feel the same

This may never start
I'll tear us apart
Can I be your enemy
Losing half a year
Waiting for you here
I'd be your anything

So get back, back, back to where we lasted
Just like I imagine
I could never feel this way
So get back, back, back to the disaster
My heart's beating faster
Holding on to feel the same

This may never start
Tearing out my heart
I'd be your memory
Lost your sense of fear
Feelings disappeared
Can I be your memory

So get back, back, back to where we lasted
Just like I imagine
I could never feel this way
So get back, back, back to the disaster
My heart's beating faster
Holding on to feel the same

This may never start
We could fall apart
And I'd be your memory
Lost your sense of fear
Feelings insincere
Can I be your memory

Can I be your memory