Friday, August 28, 2009

| the wonders of the web


Here's a little story about an interaction between a rip-off doctor with magical healing abilities and a suptard (which is a combination of super and retard but I'm guessing you've already caught it the first time).

Prologue:
Also... I read recently of another 'qualified' chiropractor that has been using distance healing for quite some time, claiming he can heal you from his living room. There’s no need to visit his office, just call or write and he will do the rest. Apparently he discovered his special chiropractic skill while he was in his car; his foot hurt and he told it to realign itself. I did not make this up.




What followed was unexpected hilarity.



****************START!!****************


From: Jane Gilles
Date: Wednesday 8 Oct 2008 12.19pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Overdue account

Dear David,
Our records indicate that your account is overdue by the amount of $233.95. If you have already made this payment please contact us within the next 7 days to confirm payment has been applied to your account and is no longer outstanding.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles



From: David Thorne
Date: Wednesday 8 Oct 2008 12.37pm
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Overdue account

Dear Jane,
I do not have any money so am sending you this drawing I did of a spider instead.
I value the drawing at $233.95 so trust that this settles the matter.

Regards, David.




From: Jane Gilles
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 10.07am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Overdue account

Dear David,
Thankyou for contacting us. Unfortunately we are unable to accept drawings as payment and your account remains in arrears of $233.95. Please contact us within the next 7 days to confirm payment has been applied to your account and is no longer outstanding.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles



From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 10.32am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Overdue account

Dear Jane,
Can I have my drawing of a spider back then please.

Regards, David.



From: Jane Gilles
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 11.42am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Overdue account

Dear David,
You emailed the drawing to me. Do you want me to email it back to you?

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles



From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 11.56am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Overdue account

Dear Jane,

Yes please.

Regards, David.



From: Jane Gilles
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 12.14pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Overdue account

Attached




From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 09.22am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Whose spider is that?

Dear Jane,
Are you sure this drawing of a spider is the one I sent you? This spider only has seven legs and I do not feel I would have made such an elementary mistake when I drew it.

Regards, David.



From: Jane Gilles
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 11.03am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Whose spider is that?

Dear David,
Yes it is the same drawing. I copied and pasted it from the email you sent me on the 8th.
David your account is still overdue by the amount of $233.95.
Please make this payment as soon as possible.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles



From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 11.05am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Automated Out of Office Response

Thankyou for contacting me.
I am currently away on leave, traveling through time and will be returning last week.

Regards, David.



From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 11.08am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

Hello, I am back and have read through your emails and accept that despite missing a leg, that drawing of a spider may indeed be the one I sent you. I realise with hindsight that it is possible you rejected the drawing of a spider due to this obvious limb ommission but did not point it out in an effort to avoid hurting my feelings. As such, I am sending you a revised drawing with the correct number of legs as full payment for any amount outstanding. I trust this will bring the matter to a conclusion.

Regards, David.




From: Jane Gilles
Date: Monday 13 Oct 2008 2.51pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

Dear David,
As I have stated, we do not accept drawings in lei of money for accounts outstanding.
We accept cheque, bank cheque, money order or cash. Please make a payment this week to avoid incurring any additional fees.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles



From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 13 Oct 2008 3.17pm
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

I understand and will definitely make a payment this week if I remember. As you have not accepted my second drawing as payment, please return the drawing to me as soon as possible. It was silly of me to assume I could provide you with something of completely no value whatsoever, waste your time and then attach such a large amount to it.

Regards, David.



From: Jane Gilles
Date: Tuesday 14 Oct 2008 11.18am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

Attached



****************END~!****************




Only in Australia.. only in Australia~

For more of this goodies visit 27b/6



Kay... Back to work!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

| when wisdom is lent


Hi, my name is Bret. Ever had one of those days when you're stuck in the office; deadline coming, work piling up, boss breathing down your neck (in a non-sexy way. just to clarify), co-workers not showing love in the slightest form.

Well, whenever I have one of those days, somehow, no matter the circumstances, Timon and Pumbaa will show up and they never fail to give Some Good Love®.



At that moment, at my lowest self-esteem, Pumbaa encouraged me an ways I've never been encouraged before. So thanks Pumbaa. Free Hugs®~



*EDITED: just (double) realized how awesome this song is


dedicated from me to you, WAYNE~!! XDFF






Bret You've Got It Going On

Hey there Bret,
I see you're looking down.
Don't wanna see my little buddy down with a frown,
Just because I get more women than you,
Well that's only because they don't know you like I do.
Sure you weedy, and kinda shy,
But some girly out there must be needy for a weedy shy guy,
They want you as they needle when they're rolling in the hay,
So just hear me out when I say...

Bret you got it going on!
The ladies'll get to know your sexuality
When they get to know your personality.
I said Bret you got it going ooon!
Not in a gay way, just in a "hey mate
I wanted to say that your looking ok mate!"

Why can't a heterosexual guy
Tell a heterosexual guy that he thinks his booty is fly?
Not all the time obviously,
Just when he's got a problem with his self-esteem.
Don't let anyone tell you you're not humpable,
Because you're bumpable,
Well I hope this doesn't make you feel uncomfortable,
If I say you got a "boom ow ow" come on Bret help me out now.

Bret you got it going on!
(Got it going on)
That's the conclusion that I've come to,
But that doesn't mean that I wanna bum you.
Bret you got it going ooon!
(Got it going on...)
No doubt about it we'd be going crazay
If one of us was lucky enough to be born a lady.

OH, if one of us was a lady!
And I was your man, if I was your man.
Well sometimes It gets lonely and I ne-ed a woman,
And then I imagine you with some bosoms.
In fact, one time when we were touring
And I was feeling really lonely,
And we were sharing that twin room in the hotel,
I put a wig on you while you were sleeping, put a wig on you.
And I just lay there and spooned you.
Bret, you got it going on.


"So, I hope that made you feel a lil better."

"Can I please have a look at the lyrics?"




Thanks for the nice short lol dude~ XDF



p.s. ai ai, got dig that guy playing the guitar or not? :P

Friday, August 21, 2009

| untold tales of a scripter

Working with scripts is like working with the other gender (do note that I did not specify which gender it is as this blog does not promote sexism in form or matter); you just can't understand what goes on in their tiny little one-line codes. Well. Not till they burst out in an thunderous tsunami of hormonal error messages which points to the part of the code that's working perfectly fine. Which is why my department, the Infineon Malaysia Information Technology Operational Services Desktop Office & Automation Client Services department consists of a high skilled workforce, moving and executing our tasks with fluidity unlike anymore... fluids.. and stuff.


the team... the A team...


Okay~ That was so 1990s.. and they were truly awesome!

Anyway, on some days I dread facing my little lappie; wondering what new error code I'll get, wondering what other typo mistakes I've made that effectively makes my script a certified virus.


i used to think vista suckalot


now...


im positive vista suckalot


Some days when I think my script is ready for a test launch, I boot up the test pc, remote control it from my lappie, push the files in - hard, runas admin and brace for impacttt!! >.<








I shut my eyes tightly as the script looks back at me with its awesome fury









After the dust settles and the radioactive particles evenly spread across the now-turned wasteland of ASCII symbols, I opened my eyes and behold;




The command failed to complete successfully.


Orly?

Bleh~

Back to work~



p.s. no script is bug free (unless of course it's made up of one line)

Thursday, August 13, 2009

| one more time- blow wind, blow~


Owh hai~ Is it time again? Time for what?
Silly you, it's time for It's Klang All Over Again!!


klang in johor


Went up to Klang last Saturday with GTai (pronounced; gee-tea-aye.. not jer-thigh), Soly and Justynieee (free hugs). Picked Miss Jess up and met up with Joash and Jayne for some Klang Bak Kut Teh, Klang- not Johor.


and where klang is, therein lies the bak kut teh


After that we headed down to 1Utama to chill.. because we can. Yea~

Lunch at Carl's Jr where Stynieee (free hugs) reminisce of a time when he almost ran off with Carl's Jr's serviette dispenser. That Serviette dispenser and Stynieee (free hugs) goes waaaay back. Btw, met up a whole lotta seniors from CF of old and a flasher. Some of them my younger readers have never met before, others all too familiar.


the mark and the (single) korean



the lion and the grace



rebecca lee and jujitsu



anon anon anon anon






mr affryll and ms getsube


Was pretty fun talking with all these old them working people. Hearing their stories of their past exploits, especially ThatKoreanGuy (you dawg~!). You make Edison blush like a silly girl scout.. or a police woman.. actually, it depends on you, ThatKoreanGuy.


she is reserved.. so back off!



lots and lots of people


The lot us were going to have dinner in TGIF and I was just going to order when..
    In the nick of time.. I was.. driven by emotions.. (wooaaaaooooo~)

And my brother whom recently injured himself picked me up and whisked me away to some Korean BBQ house thingy with a name almost similar to an old japanese manga/anime about of retard boy who fantasises having friends and a robot companion aptly named...


mounnn~ ang ang ang..


This Friday, my family will be heading up to KL to visit my bro and we're gonna have dinner in this restaurant so bro wanted me to evaluate the quality of this place. Ergo~


modern-japanese'ish sitting style +1



unlimited side dishes +5



seasoned pork ribs +4



meat, wrongly placed on our table (and taken away later) -1



people cooking for us +3



garlic?!!!111oneone!!11 +9000



awesomely tender beef +4



more free dishes?? +3


Crashed at my bro's friend's apartment and the following morning, headed to cyber campus to celebrate with some special peeps. They're people whom I cherish and hold near to my heart. People whom I've celebrated wiht joy and laughter, as well as mourn and cry alongside with. These are my brothers and sisters.

















And of all of these peeps who graduated, only one deserve the true Applaud Of The Ages. He is the one and only..






The Little Green Froggie~


Well..

wontdieone.blogspot congratulates ya'll!!


It's not by choice but by circumstances that I can't be there, graduating with you guess though I really do wish I could but I guess it's not in His will.

Owh btw~ Met Miss DD who's lost somewhere in KL for so long. blek~



After Some Seriously Bad Service from Secret Recipe, Sunway Pyramid.


it was so bad, he slept


The three homeless peeps, Juju, Koo-Cheng and myself met up with the Lulus for some dinner and to bunk in at their hotel later that night.


so much for that~



the room


Woke up the next morning to go for Styniee's (free hugs) convo! Nearly missed him as the ceremony ended earlier than expected but in the end, he called out to me us and we answered~


it is so rare that such ghey pictures exists


Btw~


Koo-Cheng haz did gud serviz



pirated pics have unknown qualities



smiles and smilez


The past few weeks haven't been kind to me. Lots of struggles and lots of smiles. Precious things were aging and dying slowly while some have died altogether.


this watch given to me by ps neil smith from australia



the faithfully serving, slowly dying amp



the fried gt-6 (with hope of fix in view)


It's rather interesting that one of the previous' week's Sunday message was nicely summarized into two lines of wisdom:

It's time to learn to let go of what was
in order to see what is and can be~


Despite the simplicity in it's meaning, the difficult questions still remains; to let go of what?




I guess not many people know and even if they do, they can't comprehend how much my old watch means to me, what it symbolizes to me. So with me now donning on this new watch, it just means that old annointing is dead and gone; something was given up as it died and a new one will hopefully follow suit. I wonder where this new watch will take. I truly do.



But I guess..



Only time will tell~



*cue Red Alert intro
LEGAL DISCLAIMER:
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as a fact.