Monday, April 03, 2006

| sometimes, i wish i had more

Sure, we're taught to be grateful for what we have. On good days, I wake up smelling the air, thanking God for giving me another breath. On those not-so-good days, I still do thank God for them - just not all the time. On bad days, I really, honestly do wish I had more. Time. Money. Patience. Love. Understanding. Health. Yea, on bad days I really wish I had more.. I wish I could give more.

even the sun can pierce thickest forests

I wish I had the resources to make things better. To have a better quality life, instead of constantly hiding this sickness of mine. To just once.. once in a while get the things that I want, instead of holding myself back from wanting it too much because I know I'll never get them. To give you things you deserve, instead of having you go through my problems. To give you joy and happiness. For whatever I lack, I do my best to give you what I can, and I'm truly sorry for those times when I really can't.

in a circle of completed buildings, i stand abandoned

Life throws shit at my face and I'm okay with that. Sure I get pissed with things, I get pissed at myself. But yet, I smile at the crowd before me. I don't want you to get caught in the crossfire of flying shits that life throws. It's a sick and disgusting game, but heck, it does happen - shit, that is.

what little i can give

So I'm sorry for the drops of shit that stain you from my shitty hands. I'm not perfect - in fact, I'm far from it. But for whatever I can give, I will always try my best to give. For whatever I can't, I'll still try my best to give.


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